Because the Supreme Court of the United States arbitrarily and incorrectly awarded the Presidency of the United States after the 2000 election, and because a significant portion of the U.S. population requires more than four years to see clearly what lies in front of their noses, the United States of America has been controlled for the last eight years by a blathering rich kid and his sociopath handler.  This abomination has now been corrected.  We regret the error.

I fully expected immigration and “immigration reform” to be one of the key issues of the 2008 presidential campaign.  The Republican candidate was going to emphasize policy proposals and use jingoistic euphemisms that told the white, black and Asian people, in coded language, that they’d better be afraid of Mexicans and that we should send as many of them as we can back to where they came from.  Regardless of who won the election, this would have caused a large number of obedient Republicans who otherwise might not have worried too much about Mexicans to see our latest wave of immigrants as a people to fear and hate.

But this didn’t happen.

For this, I must say–eh-hem–thank you, John McCain.

From Atrios, the Master of Brevity (post quoted in its entirety):

“Remember when John McCain was running for president? That was pretty funny.”

Sarah Palin could get a $7 million book deal.

But she hasn’t yet, so perhaps I should not despair?

Nooooooooooo!!!

Regularly I like to force myself to read conservative and libertarian blogs, partly for my own amusement and partly to ensure that I don’t become to complacent and uncritical of my own views.  It can be a rattling experience sometimes if you’re more accustomed to reading blogs by those with whom you mostly agree–all the more reason for doing it.

Reading the comments on such blogs, however, can be an experience that pretty much destroys one’s faith in humanity (not that I have much myself).  The anonimity of the forum, of course, allows people to reveal their true selves in a way they wouldn’t if they were standing on the other side of the figurative water cooler.  I imagine these guys to be sniveling losers who spend their days in their mothers’ basements commenting on political blogs and masturbating to pornographic anime, though most probably are living lives we consider to be “normal.”

Take, for example, the popular libertarian blog “Vox Popoli.” Ignore, if you can, the blogger’s November 3rd prediction that McCain will win the election and jump right down to the first of 292 comments.

If Obama loses, I think we’ll see some race riots. If he wins, I think we’ll see some race riots. The difference is, if he wins, the blacks will burn their own stuff. If he loses, the blacks will burn whitey’s stuff.

Yeah!  That’s what blacks always do, right?!  SO TRUE!!!  But another commenter objects…

Wow, you fail at racism. Everyone knows that blacks will generally burn their own stuff irregardless of a win/loss. See: L.A. Riots, Katrina, numerous NBA championships, continent of Africa, etc… ;)

Why can’t those blacks be a peace-loving race like us whites?  I mean, did you see them burning their own stuff when Katrina hit?  It was amazing they could keep the fires going with all that water everywhere.

There are also many perfectly reasonable comments that I might not agree with, but so many of these people are just living in their own sad little world.

I barely even hate him anymore.

NYC Street Vendor:  Get your Obama tee shirt!  We got Obama tee shirts!

Wife snickers at the commercialization of Obama.

NYC Street Vendor (looking at wife):  We got your McCain tee shirt, too!

NYC Street Vendor’s cohorts laugh.

Wife enraged for 45 minutes.

The End.

The “Impeach Barack Hussein Obama” Facebook group is competing with the “Impeach Barack Obama” group.  Who cares if he hasn’t taken the oath of office yet?

So which group will you join?

We can all be grateful that the election is not hanging on the result in Missouri.  No rush, guys!

• Joe the Plumber (please?)
• hockey mom
• hope
• change
• maverick
• The Bradley/Wilder Effect
• Bridge to Nowhere
• lipstick on a pig
• Red States
• Blue States
• Zogby
• Reverend Wright
• Bill Ayers
• Sarah Palin

Something tells me I won’t be so lucky.

Any other suggestions?

Vote in the poll at my DailyKos diary.

Update: My most glaring omission from the original  list above:  “my friends.”

Conservative, but it gets the job done.

Update: For what it’s worth, Karl Rove predicts the same exact red-blue map as I have.  I feel yucky.